Burden of expectations

Disappointment is a sort of bankruptcy - the bankruptcy of a soul that expends too much in HOPE and EXPECTATION.  Eric Hoffer

If only we could stop hoping and expecting then we would not be living a life burdened with expectations. But that's easier said than done. Like death, not expecting is impossible. We get heartbroken because we think only in linear fashion. We expect what is convenient to us or what we want to see or hear. If we don't want to get hurt then we should expect everything so that nothing comes unexpected.

Who would have thought that India would perform so abysmally after being ranked a number one team in tests and winning the world cup? But unfortunately mostly disappointment strike hardest when you don’t expect that thing to happen. That’s why it hurts so much. All of us were thinking that this time India will win India vs. Australia test series hands down but what turned out was horrific state of Indian cricket team.

Every time Sachin goes on the field he gets the loudest cheer from the crowd hoping he’ll hit his 100^th tone but all we get is disappointment. If we expect so much from him then just think how much the little master would be expecting from him. But I guess this over expectation has made this 100^th ton a herculean task.

When Ra.One promos hit the screen we all thought that it will be career defining movie not for SRK but maybe may be for Bollywood too. We all know what happened to the viewers who went to see it. It was again a case of expectations gone haywire.

A small budget movie like Bheja Fry wooed the audiences like anything because it had no expectations attached to it. But when a sequel of the same movie is made it turns out to be a dud.

It’s not that expectations always turn out to be bad.

 

When India hosted the first F1 Grand Prix then everyone was waiting for a showdown to happen and thinking that India will mess up again like we did in CWG but this time around expectations were quashed for better. 

The best way to not get swayed from your goal is not to give in to the pressure of people’s expectations and stay silent.

As Alison McGhee said, “You are most powerful when you are most silent. People never expect silence. They expect words, motion, defense, offense, back and forth. They expect to leap into the fray. They are ready, fists up, words hanging leaping from their mouths. Silence? No.” 

That’s probably the reason why Manmohan Singh got elected second time as Prime Minister when the opposition tried every trick to repudiate him. Now it’s a different story altogeher. The same Government is bowing to every justified and non-justified pressure from its own allies and opposition. They have not been able to perform because they have stoped believing in themselves and have given up to the expectations of others.

In personal matters too we leave a burdened life. Firstly right from childhood we are expected to do well in our studies. As a result most of the children don’t get to enjoy their childhood.

In our job we are expected to perform exceptionally well over and over again. We are bound to fulfill boss’s every expectation Expectations could be as outrageous as cleaning your boss’s dirty linen in private. If he’s having an affair with someone or he’s hitting on you (when he’s married) then you are expected to know/say nothing.

When we are in a relationship then we have to live up to the expectations of our partner not just once but all the times. You fail once and your relationship goes for a toss. If you are unmarried then it’s move on. If you are married then it’s divorce.

I am not against expectations but all I mean to say is that there are two ways to be happy: improve your reality, or lower your expectations. It’s always better to be pleasantly surprised than fatally disappointed.
 

Now I am going to try and live this philosophy. Few expectations that I have lowered are:

·         Expecting Indian Cricket team to win any match outside India

·         Expecting Petrol price will not rise that often

·         Expecting that an Anna can change the fate of the most corrupt nation

·         Expecting to get a good appraisal

·         Expecting that I will not hurt anyone

·         Expecting that I’ll be understood and loved in return

I guess lowering these many expectations could be a good starting point if I am able to achieve them.

Let the mission to ‘LIVE A LIFE’ not ‘LIVE A BURDENED LIFE’ begin from here on!!!!!!!!!